You don't have to believe everything you think.

The average person has roughly 6.5 thoughts every passing minute.

6.5.

If I’m doing the math correctly that translates to 9,360 thoughts per day.

65,520 thoughts per week.

262,080 thoughts per month.

And so on.

That’s a lotta thoughts.

Many of these thoughts happen completely outside your awareness as they come so quick and automatically so as to not be noticed at all.

Other thoughts can be quite intense, pronounced, and pervasive in a way that feels intrusive.

Thoughts can be about many things.

Words.

Memories.

Song lyrics.

Melodies.

Food.

Checklists.

Inner commentary.

Images.

Sounds.

List goes on and on.

But not every thought you think is logical or true. 

And, not every logical or true thought you have is necessarily helpful to think about.

The truth is you don’t have to believe every thought that comes into your head.

Knowing this is helpful because, contrary to popular belief, you cannot stop thoughts from coming.

I once listened to a running podcast where an endurance athlete made mention of how he “only allows positive thoughts in”, to which I immediately responded by turning it off.

“No you don’t,” I thought to myself.  

I think I might have said it out loud as well.   He lost all credibility when he said that.

People simply don’t have that kind of control.

They sometimes think that if they practice things like meditation, for instance, they can somehow learn to stop certain negative thoughts from occurring.

Not true.  

The purpose of meditation is not to stop your thoughts; it’s to notice them. 

It’s to become aware of them. 

It’s to observe them.  

In so doing, you learn you are not your thoughts.  They come and they go.

But there’s nothing you can do to stop them.

Gaining mastery over your mind is about shifting your thoughts in such a way so as to be helpful to you in your life. 

To do that, you must take a spotlight and shine it on the thoughts you wish to intensify or increase the frequency of. 

The brighter the shine on your preferred or helpful thoughts, the dimmer the negative, undesirable thoughts become.

Whatever you focus on is going to grow, intensify, strengthen, just as a spotlight draws attention to its target.

With so many thoughts coming at you each day, how can you tell if a thought you are having is one to shine a light on or not?   

By examining the thought and asking, “Is this thought true?   Is this thought helpful?”   If your answer to either question is “no”, then put that spotlight on something else. 

Come up with a different thought that is true and/or more helpful, and focus on that instead.

Over time, and with enough consistency, the neural pathways responsible for the helpful thoughts get stronger. In this way, you train your brain to have more helpful automatic thoughts versus the negative ones you struggled with previously.

Thoughts come and go randomly, but you get to decide which ones you believe, which ones you focus on, and which ones you toss aside.

Therapy can help you sort through this whole process and begin to apply your brain's spotlight in ways that will serve you in your life.

To get started on learning this, and other mental training strategies, email me at Carrie@Carriemosko.com.

Out.